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Facilitation
as Spirit Practice
Barbara J. MacKay
This
paper is dedicated to all my facilitator, yogi and meditator colleagues
who desire to serve the world well in their chosen vocations.
Prelude
Both my facilitation
and spirit practices have called me to my deepest, most painful, joyful,
and meaningful interactions with life. I realize I am a different kind
of facilitator because of my long-time spiritual practices. I am able
to be present (engaged), connected, compassionate, forgiving, detached,
neutral, focused and intuitive in ways that would not have been possible
without the grounding influence of my spirit practices.
My spirit practices
include yoga, meditation, pranayama, journaling and ritual. Some of these
have been part of my life for over 40 years. I began practicing hatha
yoga at 9 years, pranayama as a teenager, added meditation in my mid to
late 20’s, and finally ritual and journaling in my late 30’s. My professional
facilitation practice has been part or all of my profession for almost
25 years.
The purpose of this
paper is to fully acknowledge how my spirit practices enrich my facilitation
work and often vice versa. I wish also to provide insight or provoke contemplation
for other facilitator and spirit practitioners.
Twenty
Core Principles
I have summarized
my thoughts into 20 core principles in a beginning-to-end sequence. I
am grateful to many facilitator colleagues who answered my question to
them of how the two practices informed each other. I feel that if I use
these principles each time I work with a group and in my own inner spiritual
discipline practices, the world will do well by me. Here they are - divided
into five "chapters", with key words bolded.
In the beginning….
- Visualize
the best possible outcome
- Begin
well
- Remember the
basics
- Align
exquisitely
- This is worth
doing
And then what…..
- Listen with curiosity
rather than judgment
- Have a sense
of wonder and awe
- Have faith in
the journey and yourself
- Getting to the
heart of the practice…….
- Manifest skill
in action
- Know that everything
changes and evolves
- Work playfully
with the energy present
- Have faith in
creative possibilities
- Have courage
to push the edges
- Appreciate
the challenges
- Pay attention
- Give generously
Bringing closure
and resolution……
- Honor closure
and integration
- Detach
from the outcomes
And remember,
when the going gets tough….
- You are not
alone
- This is a lifetime
practice
I speak to each of
these principles in some detail below.
In
the beginning….
My facilitation work
requires extensive preparation before I begin a group session The preparation
is mental, emotional and physical. It requires that I am fully engaged
and ready to do the practice. Facilitator colleague, Jon says: "We
know it is relatively easy to walk away …but to be committed regardless
of the personal pain or difficulty, this is hard. For me it is important
to find disciplines that deepen engagement." A ritual for me
that deepens engagement is to:
Visualize
the best possible outcome
Intent, according to yoga practitioner, Dona Holleman," is the third
principle of yoga practice. She says "intent
is the projection of a clear picture of the movement we want to perform
while keeping the body in a state of relaxation and the mind in a state
of quiet alertness…." I would like to be
able to do this each time I set out to facilitate a group! Before
I enter into the group process, I find it helpful to ask myself: What
does the group need as a process to help them attain the desired outcome?
Once I have established the design of a session with the client group,
I visualize going through each step of the process skillfully with calm
presence and awareness. I see myself succeeding and being able to accomplish
whatever is needed for that day. Dona notes that the poses that are difficult
to perform are also difficult for us to visualize. This is true also for
my facilitation sessions that I view as "difficult".
Begin
well
Erich Schiffman, yoga practitioner, writes about beginning well. He says
"Begin your [asana practice] by sitting on the floor in any comfortable
position. Feel the energy in the room. Observe the colors and shapes and
be aware of how you feel. Then close your eyes and breath deeply, gently.
Savor the air for a moment as you hold your breath, then release it slowly.
Do this three times, reminding yourself that you are an integral part
of the universe. Pay attention. Pay attention to your posture, the feeling
tone of you and be relaxed and motionless. Then say a short prayer."
Facilitation also requires attention to the space in which we will "practice".
It must be arranged to be comfortable for the group. How do we create
the space conditions to not distract the group from the main task at hand?
How do we set up so that engagement occurs and is sustained? Do we want
the space to be serious or playful? How do we simultaneously allow for
both efficiency and creativity? I find it helpful for group process to
pay a great deal of attention to the space and to create an atmosphere
that participants can "savor" and be fully relaxed.
Remember
the basics
In my facilitation practice, I sometimes become attached to complexity.
I over-estimate what is needed. If I don’t pay attention, my pattern is
to plan activities that are too ambitious for the time available, rush
through the beginning, have few or no pauses to help the group absorb
what has happened or segue from one activity to the next, and create no
satisfactory ending.
What are "the basics"? My yoga practice has taught me something
here. I had been practicing advanced poses for many years and along the
way, my ambitious mind resulted in body damage. In my forties, I discovered
my spine had lost all its natural curves, I had a chronic hamstring injury
from overdoing stretches while pregnant in my early thirties, and my lung
capacity was significantly below normal. For three years, I went through
intensive chiropractic work and dared not do any advanced inverted poses,
twists or backbends. In fact, I was considering abandoning the asana work.
Fortunately, a number of unknowing saviors called me to practice yoga
with them. Finally when my back was returning to "normal", I
began a simple practice of standing poses. I found my legs and arms again.
I went back to the basics of rooting, breathing and alignment.
To me, some of the basics for the facilitator are: encouraging dialogue
and reflection and helping the group draw its own conclusions. Every session
perhaps should have at least these three qualities.
Align
exquisitely
I learned about
postural alignment best from taking B.K.S. Iyengar asana classes. I
learned to stand in alignment with shoulder bones directly above hipbones,
which were directly above anklebones. Each pose had excruciating detail
about alignment before entering the pose. This I learned would keep
our bodies from injuring themselves and allow for easy flow of energy
or prana. A satisfying yoga session also requires that I align my choice
of practice with my mental and emotional needs.
How do I align exquisitely
with my facilitation work? Prior to a session, I mentally align by discovering
carefully what are my clients’ needs. I ensure my choice of processes
align with their needs and values. During the session, I emotionally align
with the group’s energy and desires by choosing my pacing, voice tone,
volume and choice of words. As in my yoga asana practice, I serve the
group well if I continually check and adjust the alignment of processes
and energy with where the participants are or need to be.
This
is worth doing
Each
time I practice meditation or yoga, it is helpful to remind myself: "this
is worth doing" It is worth doing for me to maintain my health and
equanimity, to discover compassion and to know the impermanence of all
things. In my facilitation practice, it is worth doing because as a kind
facilitator colleague Nancy, said to me once after a particularly challenging
session, "Barb,
they are better off with you than without you." This
is only true however if I stay present with, and act according to the
group’s needs.
And
Then What…
Listen
with curiosity or non judgment
In
my spirit practices, I seek to observe my body movements and/or thoughts
and allow them to be present without judging. I listen so that I may adjust,
change or finish a pose or sitting. In facilitation, one of my guiding
principles is that all ideas are honored no matter how received by other
members of the group. They are just ideas - neutrally received.
For example, one of my colleagues, told me about a northern community
group participant who was offering solutions about managing an increasing
dog population. His idea was "kill all the dogs". As my colleague
was listening with curiosity, she asked him in a neutral tone of voice
"What are you thinking when you say that?" He said something
like "I am worried about our children’s safety and I don’t want anyone
to be killed by a dog like has happened in the past".
Stephen Levine says "When judging arises, if we acknowledge it
with a spacious non-judgmental attention, we loosen its grasp by seeing
it with compassion … with a respectful recognition of the enormity of
the power of conditioning to draw us out." Facilitator colleague,
Rosa says that "if
we connect with the hurt and suffering human being underneath the 'horror',
we are holding open the space for real transformation..."
Have a sense of wonder and awe
Here
is a principle where my facilitation work enriches my spirit practice
more than vice versa. When I am facilitating a group session, there
are unknown personalities and issues. Anything can happen in the no matter
how diligent I have been with advance interviews and meetings! These unknowns
keep my sense of wonder and awe as things unfold often dramatically different
than what I expect.
With my own spirit practices however, I more often encounter "dull
mind". Can I approach each asana or meditation practice, no matter
how many times I have done it, with a sense of newness and excitement
about the possibilities? The times that I am able to keep my sense
of wonder and awe in my spirit practices, I realize I have:
- come to the practice
with no expectations
- stayed inwardly
focused and present
- been delighted
that the agility of my mind and body are different from day to day.
Have
faith in the journey and yourself
My
own mediation practice is called Vipassana meditation in the Theravadin
tradition. As in most mediation traditions, the goal is liberation or
enlightenment. In facilitation, I am also seeking to liberate the group
in some way from: grief over past mistakes; inertia, going around the
same issues over and over again, inaction and indecision, hopelessness
to joy and resolve. I recognize that this "group liberation"
is not a release from all suffering in life as in Buddhist practice. It
is however, a useful concept for me to know that in some small way, I
am liberating the group from suffering at this moment. This gives me faith
in the journey. And, when I don’t consistently honor group members or
their ideas throughout their journey, I find that the group inevitably
has less ownership of the workshop outcomes.
Getting
to the heart of the practice…
Manifest
skill in action
After
applying the first five principles, I am ready to begin the heart
of the practice. When I feel skill in my asana practice, I notice a lightness
and ease with the flows of poses and the breathing. I avoid sloppiness
and am disciplined, precise and yielding. If I make an error, I begin
again; I realign and reset the focus of my practice if needed. When I
feel skill in facilitation, it seems effortless. There is flow, attention
to both detail and to the larger purpose and outcome. There is attention
to the subtleties in body language of participants and skillful, timely
and open-ended questions to break open a group’s thinking. Abandoning
the original plan, when nothing is flowing as expected or as needed, is
also modeling skill in action.
Everything
changes and evolves
A
fellow facilitator, Jordan says: "Yoga
has taught me that we are always evolving. It seems like facilitation
is the same." Changes are occurring minute
by minute. Perhaps I have done a 5-minute headstand a thousand times,
but this time, there is new sensation at the shoulder blades. Can I shift
my pressure of the elbows to play with new awareness?
I remember a facilitation session where I was guiding a visioning process.
Normally the energy of visioning is joyful, exuberant and satisfying.
This group’s energy was lethargic and despondent in contrast to what I
usually experience. Well after that event, I learned that the visioning
process stirred up negative emotions for that group around a previous
director’s lack of fiduciary responsibility. I am now aware that visioning
does not always earlier produce a positive emotional state for all groups
as I had assumed. The skill is to be aware that nothing is ever the same,
to be present for whatever the change is, and help participants evolve
to a new "state of being".
Work
playfully with the energy present
Yoga
authors, Gates and Kennison say: "time
spent on our mats or on our meditation cushions has the potential to be
time spent when we are not afraid. From the vantage point of our practice,
we are able to view our lives without the corrosive influence of fear".
Spirit practice helps me to be unafraid. Being
unafraid helps me to be playful with a groups’ energy. Says a fellow facilitator,
Ken "A major lesson for me has been the more serious it [the situation]
is, the lighter you need to take it -- I flew in, and trained combat aircrews
in Vietnam. It was a dark time for all of us. Humor kept us alive and
sane (In insane circumstances). When I am at sanga, again many do not
see the wandering mind playfully, they want to be enlightened NOW! AH!
To play well at serious things"
In my workshops, I use play activities to help participants be in a positive
emotional state. This positive mind state is an essential requirement
for learning, creative thinking and idea-generation. I find that playful
activities diffuse tension and increase group members’ sense of discovery,
participation and involvement. Brain research shows the monumental importance
of creating a positive climate for learning. Hannaford (1999) says "Play
lays the groundwork for creative thinking in adulthood. Play raises the
Dopamine (brain chemical) levels, which are important for neural plasticity
and optimal learning." She goes on to say,
"When we experience the complexity of others
through play, we realize we are not separate…."
Have
faith in creative possibilities
I also call
this principle "letting go". I have noticed this happen
in my spirit practice especially when in an intensive silent meditation
retreat. For example, it is the last day or hour of the long retreat.
It has been pleasant enough or intensely uncomfortable but nothing much
seems to be transpiring. I begin to let go and thank myself for the effort.
And then -BINGO – I have an aha or see things differently enough
to allow me to "let go" at an even deeper level than before.
This last minute shift also happens so often when facilitating groups
that I no longer surprised by it. It is often in the last hour of a session
that they have an aha or create the magic idea that moves them
into another realm of possibility and forward action.
Have
courage to push the edges
When I was
working through my back chiropractic adjustment phase, I slowly reintroduced
yoga (asana) practice after many years of little practice. I still had
excruciating pain in one or the other hamstring. One of my fellow students
of the advanced yoga studies program who was also a body worker told me
"just go to the edge of the pain and then back off from that a bit".
I worked this way for the whole first year and miraculously, the hamstring
is now only occasionally a minor problem. I ask myself: Does this concept
work for groups? Could I take them just to edge of their pain and then
back off a bit?
Appreciate
the challenges
In the first
year (2002) of my three-year intensive advanced yoga studies program,
I recall being very challenged physically, mentally and emotionally. I
could not do many of the forward bend series or standing poses because
of the hamstring problem and I had not practiced back bends or inversions
for years. I did not appreciate the challenge that this unskilled, unpracticed
body posed. I cursed that I was not "as good" as I used to be.
I felt like a rank beginner after having maintained a high level of skill
for decades. I felt ashamed. In year two of the program, I had a huge
insight when one of my instructors chided me for not paying attention.
That small incident triggered a lot of emotional pain. Why? I realized
that all my life, when I believed that I would not be able to meet a challenge,
I would mentally "check out". (Imagine how unhelpful that is
to a group who is relying on me to be their process guide?) As I processed
my reaction to this incident, I stayed present with, and acknowledged
the deep shame I had buried related to "not being able to perform".
As some say "I faced the dragon and the dragon was me." Now,
as I enter my third year of yoga study and practice, I realize that I
better embrace the challenges. I feel invigorated by the fact that that
I have room to grow and become more skilled. I do not cringe as much at
the thought of non-performance. I believe this attitude has infiltrated
into my facilitation practice as well. I face challenging work now with
more equanimity and do not avoid it.
Pay
attention
This has
been my life mantra for some time. It has helped me likely because of
the pattern I talked about above of "checking out" when I had
a feeling I would not be able to perform as expected. In my meditation
practice, I often silently say, "pay
attention!" when the mind is wandering and
not wanting to be present. In my asana practice, I am now trying to pay
attention just to the movement that is being executed at this moment and
the inner response that this movement creates.
In my group work, I have had the recent privilege of many people asking
to "shadow" me when I facilitate. So I have had an assistant
(or two) for almost every facilitated session in the past year. What this
has done is allow me to pay much more attention to the energy of the group
and to the subtleties of participants’ body language, mood and facial
expressions. Thich Nhat Hanh, mindfulness teacher says "the
answer to helping lesson the suffering of people around us and making
their lives happier is to practice mindfulness".
Co-facilitation has helped me be more present or mindful of the group’s
needs and adjust on a moment-by-moment basis.
Give
generously
Jon Kat-Zinn
says, "Generosity
is another quality… which provides a solid foundation for mindfulness
practice". He says "See
if you can be in touch with a core within you which is rich beyond reckoning
in all important ways. Let that core start radiating its energy outwardly,
through your entire body, and beyond. Experiment with giving away this
energy – in little ways at first – directing it toward yourself and towards
others with no thought of gain or return. Give more than you think you
can, trusting that you are richer than you think. Celebrate this richness.
Give as though you had inexhaustible wealth. This is called "kingly
giving."
I try to give participants in a group setting this level of generosity.
For example I strive to be generous in my interpretation of their words
and generous in my time with them and my offering of help. When I do,
the atmosphere changes from tightness and tension to one of large magnanimity.
Everyone starts being generous with each other! Jon Kabat-Zinn goes on
to say "You find that rather than exhausting yourself or your
resources, you will replenish them. Such is the power of mindful, selfless
generosity. At the deepest level, there is no giver, no gift and no recipient…only
the Universe rearranging itself."
Bringing
closure and resolution……
Honor
closure and integration
Facilitator
colleague, Eleanor, says: "The(re is the) importance of reflection
and closure. After yoga practice, (it is) to quiet the body and mind and
integrate the experience. After a group meeting, (it is) an evaluation
to integrate the experience." In my early asana practice days, I
was taught to have long relaxation (Savasana or corpse pose) periods after
the practice. This was wonderful! I would lie there for 5-10 minutes and
sometimes doze but more often just deeply relax into a quiet state of
content being. When I resumed my daily activities, I was refreshed, happy
and alert. I don’t do that as often now in my daily practice because of
my sense of obligation to family, clients and colleagues. I realize as
I write that I am doing them and myself a disfavor because this rest time
allows me to be more fully alert and present for my family, clients and
colleagues.
In facilitating group process, I know how important it is to allow a group
closure on a day’s or even an hour’s good work. A few good questions that
allow all members to state what they did in the session, what was the
experience for them, what they learned from it and what they will do next
are essential for the group’s well being. It allows each participant to
proceed onto his or her next activity refreshed, thoughtful and alert.
Detach
from the outcomes
One of my
meditation practices is known as metta or Loving Kindness. My long
time yoga/meditation teacher, Shirley says that metta is about "relating
all conditioned experiences with an attitude of kindness, and accepting
things as they are". Non-attachment is a strong principle
in both the Buddhist and Hindu traditions. The Buddha said that there
are four noble truths. The first is that life is suffering. The second
is that suffering is caused by greed or attachment arising from the delusion
in not seeing the true nature of things. The third is that this condition
of suffering can cease with release from greed and neurotic clinging.
And the forth is that freedom from suffering can be realized by investigating
the noble eightfold path. The noble eightfold path consists of right understanding,
intention, speech, action, livelihood, effort, mindfulness and concentration.
When I left a difficult job almost ten years ago, one of my yoga colleagues,
Kay, gave me a card which had words something to the effect of: whatever
is happening is exactly what is supposed to be happening. At first,
I didn’t "get it"! In every aspect of my life, I have
been geared towards making things happen the way I wanted them to happen.
When I first started facilitating for example, I used to believe that
the client would not pay or rehire me if I did not help them achieve the
outcomes we jointly set out to achieve. Yet, over the years, I have noticed
that as each moment progresses in a facilitated session, the previously
defined outcomes also shift. What I thought were the "right"
outcomes three days or three hours or three minutes ago, have changed.
Different outcomes will be more beneficial. This is the process of staying
present to the needs of the group. And to the needs of our practice. This
is the practice of detaching from the outcomes. This relieves my own suffering
about not achieving particular outcomes with a group and releases the
group from clinging to particular outcomes.
And
remember, when the going gets tough….
You
are not alone
Although
we human beings are ultimately alone in this world, many have traveled
the same path. In that sense, I know that I share common experiences with
many others. With this in mind, I often call on other practitioners to
support me in my journey to "perfection", to freedom, and to
wisdom. This has been an enormous benefit to call on colleagues near and
far, in times of doubt, when I need support in this life journey or with
a particular group process which is challenging for me.
This
is a lifetime practice
The joy
of both spirit and facilitation practice to me is that I can always improve.
It has taken me decades to feel consciously competent in
my facilitation practice. I recognize now more quickly when I slip into
conscious incompetence (in other words I know that I have erred and need
to improve).
This year, I feel
very consciously incompetent in my meditation and yoga practices. And
I am heartened by the words of Joseph Goldstein who speaks of
"cultiva(ting)
and nourish(ing) certain qualities that support and propel us forward
into freedom: the pali word Paramis refer to ten wholesome qualities
in our minds and the accumulated power they bring to us:
- Generosity
- Morality
- Renunciation
- Wisdom
- Energy
- Patience
- Truthfulness
- Resolve
- Loving kindness
- Equanimity"
May we each find the
strength and patience to bring these qualities into all aspects of our
life and vocational practices.
Barbara
J. MacKay
North Star Facilitators
June 2004
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